


The tallest x Crowbar!Reader

by geneolgia



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Crowbars, Other, but this is invader zim what do you expect, extreme violence, lots of yelling, orbs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2019-09-06
Packaged: 2020-10-11 11:15:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20545241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/geneolgia/pseuds/geneolgia
Summary: do you like the tallest? guess what you're gonna fucking obliterate them





	The tallest x Crowbar!Reader

**Author's Note:**

> idea was a collaboration between the members of GIR FETCH ME MY DAB PEN.  
written by squeegee uploaded by me with her express permission
> 
> "In this fanfiction you have a crowbar. Somehow this has caused you to end up on the Massive. You just have to live with it."

_In this fanfiction you have a crowbar. Somehow this has caused you to end up on the Massive. You just have to live with it._

"ugggghhh my head hurts... actually i changed my mind, my whole body hurts." you groaned. This was because you were in the middle of the floor on some huge ship and a bunch of bastards in boots were walking over you. You struggled to your feet and noticed you were holding a crowbar.

"Cool, i guess i have this now." You said. "Oh purple, it would appear our guest has woken up." A voice from a different part of the room spoke. You looked over and saw two very tall green people approaching you. They had figures that could put even the most stunning model to shame, and long fingers that resembled acrylics, with which they were holding a multitude of donuts (which looked like bland, expired bagels, fight me on this). One had eyes of vibrant crimson, and the other's were deep violet. As you locked eyes with these beautiful people, you knew in this moment that these were real men, like no other you'd ever see in your lifetime, and that filled you with irrational anger.

"Where the heck am I, you fucking dongs?" You shouted accusingly. The purple one gasped.

"There's no need to use such language, Y/N!" He scolded.

"Ok fine, where the fuck am i, you hecking dongs? The last thing I remember is being sold to One Direction." You replied.

"Ha ha ha" the red one chuckled. He was laughing. "We are the Almighty Tallest, you're on the Massive- the largest spaceship in space, and you ended up here because One Direction sold you to us. We're not really sure why, but it only cost us 67 cents."

"Damn, I thought Niall really cared," You whispered, tears forming in your E/C orbs. You felt a long finger brush against your face and wipe your tears away.

"Don't cry, Y/N, your orbs are extra spherical today" Red reassured you.

"Yeah kween," Purple added. Without giving it another thought, you swung your crowbar at his knees. Purple spat out his soda with incredible force and it landed on some navigator guy. [camera zooms in on navigator guy as he questions all his life choices. "Numb" by Linkin Park is playing]

"What in the shit, Y/N, you're supposed to tell us that our eyes are pretty." Purple moaned, clutching his knees.

"Yeah, that wasn't very sexy of you." Red said, disappointment shone in his ruby orbs.

"I don't care, i got a crowbar and i'm going off the shits." You responded, turning to face him. There was a terrified look on his face.

"OH GOD, Y/N PLEASE NOT THE CROWBAR, I CAN'T LOSE MY KNEECAPS," Red pleaded, bracing for impact. Your expression softened. He did seem very attached to his kneecaps. It made you feel a little bad about what you were going to do.

"Do you really care that much about your kneecaps?" You ask the Irken in a less angry tone.

"Yes," He answered.

"He does." Purple added. "All right then. I won't whack you in the knees with my crowbar." You sighed. And then proceeded to whack him in the waist with your crowbar.

Red instantly fell down onto the linoleum floor and screeched.

"WHY MUST THE WORLD BE CRUEL?" He yelled. Meanwhile, two other navigator guys watched the whole thing with popcorn.

"You think we should stop them?" One asked.

"Nah."


End file.
